Nosemonkey's EUtopia

In search of a European identity

Polly Toynbee: moronic arse (part 5,687)

A quickie, because I’ve found a spare five minutes and keep forgetting how much of a fucking idiot Polly Toynbee is. Wait – CS Lewis’s Chronicles of Narnia are, like, a Christian allegory? REALLY? Well there’s something that no one’s ever spotted in the 50 years since the books first started appearing. A fucking revelation, Polly, you twat.

Does that stop them from being damn good stories (well, apart from A Horse and His Boy and The Last Battle, obviously)? Of course not.

For the record, I despise all forms of religion, and find most religious types self-satisfied bores. But none are as bad as Toynbee, with her blatant attempts to rile the buggers while – seemingly – advising all true Guardian-reading liberal lefties to avoid what’s sure to be one of the films of the month out of an anti-Christian bigotry which would, were it directed against Muslims or Jews, be the subject of yet another 2,000-word rant from the deranged hag hack of Farringdon, labelling anyone who even momentarily THOUGHT such abject rubbish only one step away from shoving people into gas chambers.

And so we enter into the age-old, tedious sixth-former anti-religion bullshit:

“Of all the elements of Christianity, the most repugnant is the notion of the Christ who took our sins upon himself and sacrificed his body in agony to save our souls. Did we ask him to?”

No, Polly, we didn’t. THAT’S THE WHOLE FUCKING POINT.

I would ago into a point-by-point demolition of the tired old “Tolkien and Lewis were racist and classist etc. etc.” bollocks that poorly-read idiots who quickly trawl the internet for research always trot out as well (I’ve written a book on the fucking thing after all), but Toybee simply isn’t worth the time or effort of anything more than violent insults.

Note to any Christians (Christian Voice, I’m looking at you) who have the misfortune of reading this particularly ill-thought-out, deliberately baiting piece of mindless, critically-deficient dross: ignore her and she’ll go away. There’s another article on Sure Start waiting for her just round the corner, and she’ll have forgotten all about this by tea-time.

Note to the Guardian: if you want an actually intelligent, considered analysis of the relationship between the Narnia books, the new film, the Disney corporation, Christianity and the power the American religious right wield over Hollywood from someone who actually knows what the fuck they’re talking about, my email’s above.

21 Comments